Lately I've been checking my blog, wanting to post something, but having nothing to say. I keep thinking this is because I'm content and happy...
Today reality hit me hard!
I'm numb!
This past year has gone by, I've met so many new people, yet it feels like I have nobody. The people I consider my closest friends, I barely speak to and I'm to BLAME! I'm so caught up in everyday life that I have completely lost sight of myself! I go to work, come home, download stuff that have no real substance, sleep, study, sleep some-more and repeat day after day... I have no idea how to get out of this rut that I'm currently in. I don't know how to fix and mend all the relationships I've allowed to crumble.
I think that I've pushed them away because I'm ashamed. I'm ashamed of the direction my life is heading in... I'm afraid to admit that I'm terrified of what to expect in the next couple of years. I'm afraid that I'm just not good enough for any of them. I feel shattered, pieces of me are scattered and I have no idea how to put all the pieces back together. I don't even know where to begin!
Today reality hit me hard!
I'm numb!
This past year has gone by, I've met so many new people, yet it feels like I have nobody. The people I consider my closest friends, I barely speak to and I'm to BLAME! I'm so caught up in everyday life that I have completely lost sight of myself! I go to work, come home, download stuff that have no real substance, sleep, study, sleep some-more and repeat day after day... I have no idea how to get out of this rut that I'm currently in. I don't know how to fix and mend all the relationships I've allowed to crumble.
I think that I've pushed them away because I'm ashamed. I'm ashamed of the direction my life is heading in... I'm afraid to admit that I'm terrified of what to expect in the next couple of years. I'm afraid that I'm just not good enough for any of them. I feel shattered, pieces of me are scattered and I have no idea how to put all the pieces back together. I don't even know where to begin!
